April 30th of last year was a day I will never forget! It’s a day that changed my life, sent my world spiraling out of control, and took me to a place of complete desperation. It brought me to the end of myself and to the beginning of God’s grace. The past year has been a journey of healing, trust, and deeper connection with God, all while fighting for my life.
I had been sick for years with extreme fatigue, muscle and joint pain, chronic headaches, vitamin deficiencies, and continual upper respiratory infections. But I just kept pushing through it, hoping and praying it would get better one day. I had been diagnosed with various conditions by medical doctors over the years, including Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (now known as CFS and myalgic encephalomyelitis), Fibromyalgia, stomach disorders and chronic bronchitis. My immune system had just been so weakened, that I seemed to be sick most of the time. And the extreme fatigue and pain persisted to the point of complete exhaustion. I couldn’t walk a flight of stairs without feeling like my legs were going to buckle beneath me. The diagnoses that I had received up until this point would turn out to be, in reality, a series of misdiagnoses. I wouldn’t find out until later what the true cause of these symptoms was.
In March of 2016, I began having knee pain in my left knee that wouldn’t go away. It wasn’t caused by an injury. I just woke up one day, and it was there. I was limping every time I walked, and sometimes the pain was so bad I could barely walk at all. As all of these symptoms began to worsen, I found myself going into the bathroom at work for 5 minutes to cry and try to pull myself together, so that I could continue the workday. The pain and fatigue were unbearable! So, with the doctor’s advice and instruction from the Lord, I took a Leave of Absence to rest and focus on my health and recovery. What I thought would be a temporary medical leave, however, turned out to be the end of my working all together. A month later, on April 30, 2016, my health took a turn for the worse. When my husband carried me into the ER, I was throwing up, shaking uncontrollably, had 102 fever, and my BP was 70/ 43. I couldn’t hold my head up and could barely speak. I was going in and out of consciousness as the ER doctor opened my eyes and tried asking me questions. Once they stabilized me, I was admitted into the hospital for what would be the first of five times over the next 3 months. I was told I had Sepsis in my blood, indicating an infection and the beginning of what could be organ failure. The doctors had no idea what infection we were dealing with or what caused it. But I stayed on the Cardiac floor for a week while tests were run and blood was drawn every few hours. This had been the scariest time in my life. I had truly felt like I could die. Helpless and afraid, I reached out to the only one who had the answers, and I held on for dear life (literally). I knew He was the only one who could get me through this!
And He is the only one who will get you through what you are facing! He is the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning, the End, and everything in between! He is our Comforter, our Healer, and our Redeemer of all things broken, dead, or sick. He the Master Creator and the Giver of Life! Our ONLY hope is in Him!